I am a Giant Pile of Retarded or How I Broke my Phone

I dunked my phone in a glass of water today, much as I would imagine one would dunk a cookie in milk, though I have no actual experience with the latter. Now, you would think I would grow used to these kind of idiotic occurrences by now, having experienced many, but lo' and behold they still catch me off guard.

This one started Thursday night when I ran out of Coke and went to the store to buy some. There I saw a sale consisting of two monster-sized energy drinks for $3, and figured "what the hell." I drank the Sobe that night, and sat up playing Mario Sunshine since my 10 a.m. on Friday was cancelled. That left me with an amped(R) just sitting in my fridge, until Friday night when I decided to drink it for no real purpose. Jimmy, mooch that he is, asked for some, and on my way to get him a glass I spotted his Jager shot glasses and decided to pour us each one amped(R) of those instead. My shot glass ended up in my room, and while ADDing that weekend I found that it fit my phone perfectly, serving as an excellent, though admittedly unnecessary, stand.

Yesterday, as already chronicled, I burned my finger via electric shock. Being the giant Nancy that I am, I ended up dunking my finger in a glass of ice-water to cool my burned flesh. Well, the ice eventually melted, yielding one glass of plain water on my desk, next to my Jager shot glass. If you don't see where this one is going yet, you might want to seek help.

So, James went to the library to study tonight, and since my printer blows, I asked him to print stuff for me while there. I picked up my phone to text him about how I was sending it, then thought better of it as texts aren't in my plan. Since I was currently occupied at the time with something or other I can't recall all of an hour later, I just reached to my left to return the phone to its mount. It was about 2/3 underwater before it dawned on me that bad things were afoot.

Over the past hour I've watched the screen flicker then black out, the beeper go off at random, and ultimately, watched it perish. My only hope is that I can get the screen working enough to transfer my newer numbers to my old phone which, ironically enough, I just found a few weeks ago after thinking it lost, and had just used to update my new phone with numbers I hadn't gotten again since losing it.

I'm afraid my phone will no longer serenade me with the theme from Zelda, or that song from the Mos Eisley bar in the first (well, fourth) Star Wars movie. You served me well for your few short months phone, fair thee well.